Where is somebody?Anybody?

I guess the only one true person in the world I could rely on for this treacherous weeks and months to come is Mari.
She has been there..
She calls me at times when I need her most.We share the good and the bad times we are experiencing together.
I'm not saying all my other mates are less important but I can't seem to have the strength and esteem to even text anyone of you(s) about my day.
Like last night,Mari called me up after her shift and asked if I would like to meet her up.
And mind you,She's about 45 minutes away from where I am,home and she rides all the way from the North West or wherever the hell that is to come and sit and talk to me till quite late.

And tonight,she did it again.We had smokes,she gave me a new name which I love so much "Virgin Cibai!" and I call her "Erected Nipples!".
And probably dinner tomorrow night after the stupid fucking CP.
I don't know.We'll see.

My day today has been alright up till the end of my fucking shift.
I honestly need to swap shift with anyone opposite of mine!I can't stand the fucking faces I see anymore.
Its driving me insane!
Oh and for break during lunch,I met Amirah!
We had some chit chat over food and we complained about certain people*winks winks*.
Even her male friend did the same too until curry was spilt on his pants.haha.

So lately,
I have been sick.Walked around the ward coughing endlessly and sneezing like I had some fatal disease.Now Ms Tan asked me to walk around with a mask around my face -.-
I look retarded cause I'm the only one wearing one except for some random visits from the doctors in OT.
And I'm losing my mates for some personal reasons..
I am cutting off relations with certain people,and I think I should post it up in my fucking blog just in case "you" start wondering why.

I am in short of something and I can't quite get it what it is.
I am being pushy over small things,I'm making life difficult for myself.
My eyes are burning,my guts are ablaze and my mouth is shooting fire balls.
What the fuck,right?
There used to be one fucking person who can make me feel calm but no longer around..
So far and distant,so alive yet so dead.
Where the fuck are you when I fucking need you?
Come back already,please?
I swear I haven't forgotten anything that you have said.
Through but never apart.
Apart but never away.
Away but so dead.
Fucck.

And here David is rattling on about his new love life.
I'm not jealous,but it pisses me off when he won't shut up about it.
And by what he's described,that woman sounds like a ______(fill in the blank yourself).
But I'm not the one to judge.He's a grown man,he knows best.
So,Fuck.

Life is shitty but I'm going to have keep fighting and pushing through thorns till there's no point of return.
Amen.
Good luck,Good fuck!
Cheers.
Hate,Appreciate!
P.s:I gave a good chunk of myself to you and you still wouldn't appreciate?Fuck it.