Trust yourself with hope,faith and love.Things works out one way or another,eventually.



Wednesday, September 29, 2010

My time is running out


Today is a beautiful day.
It is all sweet smile from the sunshine and I feel good in the inside.
I am left with this week and next to make use of my holiday period,after that,I guess all hell will break loose.
Oncology.
I have no idea why I chose that module,I might either sink or swim this upcoming semester if I am even chosen for it.
I am trying to be optimistic and even if I got in and the module sucks,I am going to try and do good at it and put in as much effort anyway.
These last few months before I graduate is going to be depressing
-the few people I have met since school,will eventually part and we'll lead our own separate lives.
Ah fuck it.People come and go,right?
hahahaha.
With that being said..
I feel kind of sorry for my beloved Din.
I think he deserves more than what I can give,emotionally,physically and mentally perhaps.
As much faith as I have in our relationship,I can't help it but feel bad.
Din deserves a good woman,a woman who is everything that I'm not.
I have had the best time in my life and our relationship is more than what I have always wanted a relationship to be.It is full of life,it is definitely real and we're both trying to make it worth the fights and good times.
This could probably be my first serious relationship and at this stage,I am already thinking of backing out.hahaha.
I am a big time wuss,
I do want us to go somewhere but right now,I need to figure out my life first.
Lets hope I can do both at the same time?
I don't want to jeopardize our relationship,but until I can achieve the things a super woman has,or at least some qualities of it,I will be ever so glad to stick by Din's side and make him my only one.
Until all my insecurities will finally rest.
The most scariest thing of all is how strongly I feel for him as days go by,I know how eeky this sounds but it terrifies me to know that I can actually feel this way.
What I had with Sebastian was great too but with Din,I am feeling something more.
It is like I feel whatever happens in the future,I have a feeling Din will somehow be there.
I have never cared for anyone so much and this my friends,is a shocker.
hahahaha.
I am beyond words grateful I have finally met the person whose made me feel comfortable in my own skin but maybe he just deserves more than me.
Wish me luck for now,yeah?
Till then,toodles.
Love,Appreciate!
P.s:Maybe I was kidding myself right from the start.

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