I have afternoon shift tomorrow,and I'm glad I'm going back to the ward tomorrow.
Well,I just got home tonight.
I went over to Nana's and crashed at hers,been ages since I last did.
So we went over to Mai's and bought the necessary knick knacks and last night,I finally get to see Mai and Mariam.The best surprise is when I finally see Aki again.Mai kept teasing and all Aki and I could afford to do is exchange glances and awkward smiles.We didn't talk to each other but we had to be near each other since we were in a small room.All of us could've been suspected as junkies cause the room was constantly filled up with smoke and thank god for two high powered fans.Later in the night Eddy and Vince came over and the place was more cramped than it ever was.Pretty much just kick back and relaxed.Laid around and smoke a lot.
Talking when necessary cause the silence was ironically comforting with that much people in a limited space.
I enjoyed my time there last night.It was a ball!
I think there would be another of such event next week,can't wait for that but lets hope nobody bails out on everyone else.har har har.
Had enough of that kind of shit for the time being.
Well,tonight,I don't feel too well.I mean I have yet to be fully recovered from the runny nose and the constant coughing but what I mean is that;it seems like my spirit is kind of depressed.
I don't know why but I feel like crap.I have an almost non existent amount of responsibility but it seems like I have got a lot to finish.Like I am actually procrastinating on something which is not even there.But I know for myself that I am way at the back of my own league and it is actually slowly catching up on me and trying to make me fall to my knees again.I know what I'm saying doesn't really make sense almost half the time anyway but I swear to God something is just not right again this time round.
Though it does not consist of racing heartbeats(though there was a one time experience on Wednesday) but apart from that,I am generally fine.
It does not consist of sudden tears.
It does not consist of the weight of the world on my shoulder.
I just feel listless,like a lost soul.
Cause honestly,as much as I try not to think as much of anything and everything(heeding on to the words he once told me) my mind is racing with multiple of questions which I doubt I will have answers for myself.
I reflect a lot.I am comfortable with myself.But there is far too much more than that,that I actually over see.I am clueless as to what I'm trying to express but not everything has to make sense having to live in this world which is ageing rapidly.
Oh well,Things will be better I suppose.
Faith is all I got now.
Love,Appreciate!
P.s:Where the fuck are you?
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